I am so lucky to have wonderful conversations with women - lately, I have heard an undercurrent that I recognize. It is the desire for a static end-state of all that we most want, done and dusted. In other words - a fix, finally, for all the messy flaws we experience in ourselves and in our lives and in our work and yes, with our money. 

I often have to remind myself that part of life is that it shifts and changes and when that happens, it opens up new opportunities (ugh, fuck, blech is my typical first response to THAT) for growth for transformation and for renegotiating what is most important in life.

So today, I invite you to soften that desire for a fix and to perhaps turn toward the messy, beautiful nature of you of life. 

Let's begin with the truth: there is no fix.

In fact, you actually do not require fixing. You're not a machine. You're not a toaster with a faulty heating element. There is no final steady state of perfection,...

Recently I've been hearing from women who have reflected on the fact that even after lots of coaching, support, and mindset work that they still experience fear and a sense of lack around money and worthiness at certain times. Sometimes (or a lot of the time) they wake up anxious, thoughts spinning, uncertainty following their every step. 

Perhaps you have seasons in your life where all the personal development and the mindset shifts don't seem to work. In those moments, you may feel like you've done something wrong - because all of the "better thoughts" didn't "fix" you. Beloved you, life is life, and uncertainty and challenges arise. Nothing can protect you from that. But the work you've done will help you negotiate those times in your life with more skill and with more ease - and that, I believe is the real result we seek. 

However, the other thing to remember is that mindset work often doesn't offer the...

This last week, I've been reflecting and it's high time for my personal and family money refresh. This is something that began about twelve years ago, and I don't think I've ever shared it with you. In today's love letter, I'm going to share when to do a money refresh, what that might look like for you, and the most important question to ask yourself when doing a money refresh. 

There are times when life is hectic.

Even writing that makes me giggle because, of course life gets hectic. And when life gets hectic in my corner of the world, my money practices definitely slip or, circumstances dictate that my money practices require a refresh. 

Case in point. Over the last eighteen years, my family and I have moved twelve times. Every time we move, there is a change in expenses and often income. Not only that but moves are filled with expenses that are unexpected. Other times that our money awareness can wane are during illnesses or travel or periods of grief. 

When...

You have so much to offer.

I am continually awestruck by the gifts and talents of the women I am surrounded by. I am also very clear that something is amiss with how women who serve value themselves and their work.  I write this letter in love and support so that you might see a different way forward for yourselves, your family, and your business.

Coaches, leaders, and healing professionals, I bow to you.

You are a wide sweep of the population.  You are largely women, many of you are mothers.  ALL of you have felt called to do something great in this world.  To teach. To heal. To create.  To serve.

You are here to make the world a better place.

No, you are making the world a better place, and I love you for that.  I love you for that urge to lift others up through your own special mix of experience, talents, training, and longing.  I see you doing so much for others and I see you striving to serve more people, to create...

I believe we can, and we must, do hard things.

It is a battle cry of our culture of productivity and innovation - to push through, to get the job done,  or (as Nike admonishes) Just Do It. For much of my young life, I set my jaw and said yes to doing the work with little regard for the impact that doing the work was having on me.

At the ripe age of 29, during the tech boom of the nineties, I was working 70 - 80 hours per week making 6-figures when I realized with horror that there was no amount of money that was going to make the work I was doing satisfying to me. Furthermore, the pace and the pressure were inhumane. 

I set off to find a different way and, after recreating the same kind of conditions in my OWN business at least once (more like twice), I found (and applied) the secrets to doing hard things. I call this approach my hustle-free, heart-centered, hedonistic AF approach to...

Cliff notes version: Prioritizing rest is the embodiment of a more-than-enough life. Are you giving yourself the rest you need? 

What is rest, anyway?

Is it naps? Is it not doing anything? Is it retiring from life? Is it healing from an injury? Is it only allowed during total exhaustion?

Let’s make sure we are working with the same definition of rest.

1. the refreshing quiet or repose of sleep:

2. refreshing ease or inactivity after exertion or labor:

3. relief or freedom, especially from anything that wearies, troubles, or disturbs.

For sure, rest is a regenerative pathway to being the human you wish to be.

What I hear most often is “I’m so tired.”

If a woman isn’t actively tired, she is likely wired and amped up, totally in the “busy zone” that our culture absolutely loves.

Neither of these states (tired or wires, or tired and wired) supports our highest vision, our best work, or our best decisions....

I know.

It's easy to slip into hopelessness. To be paralyzed by the state of the world. To believe that you, and your action, cannot possibly change a thing given the enormity of the challenges the world faces today. 

Take a deep breath and place your hand over your heart. Remember, you alone are not responsible to mend the woes of the world. Your work is to address what is in front of you, to address that which speaks to your heart and pulls you forward. To step forward with the hope that your actions, step by step, contribute to a more just and beautiful world. 

When you are faced with the overwhelm of the world, consider the following five shifts that can bring you back to hope - and right action. 

Five shifts to support hope and right action.

• Resist the urge to go into react and fix mode when you encounter despair. When you react, it’s possible you are simply trying to assuage your discomfort or guilt over what is happening in the world. It is...

In today's blog, I want to invite you to challenge the narratives of busyness and prioritize rest and pleasure for the health of your own ecosystem, yes, but also because it is the only way to sustainably and joyfully do what is yours to do in the world. 

Busyness is a sinister actor.   

The shady narrative that exalts exhaustion, distraction, multi-tasking, and never-ending to-do lists infuses even the noblest of causes -- maybe even more so. I mean, who has time to rest when the world is on fire? However, if we are really interested in putting out the fire and addressing the underlying capitalist assumptions of endless productivity and growth that keep us running (or running to fight the fires that are fanned), we have to slow the fuck down and become deliberate with our presence and energy. 

You can't fight fire with fire.

Let me tell you something I know in my very bones - if you are empathic if you care if you are someone who is on fire to...

I want to share a metaphor that helped me move from overwhelm to having a generative vision for the world that I wish to live in. At the bottom of this week's letter, I've included a visualization to help you experience the old-growth forest. My hope is that it supports you in moving from overwhelm to saying yes to what is yours to do.

Begin with hope and a vision.

To create something new, we need hope and a vision. While reading articles and literature written by Black American luminaries for one of my master’s courses, a theme emerged – racism is a problem for white people to solve. This came through over and over again, prompting me to consider what I might contribute to equity in the world.

It was in contemplation that I realized I did not have a vision for what an equitable, sustainable society would even look like. My life (like most everyone in western countries) is dependent on, and benefits from, the very structures that perpetuate (and...

The world is hurting right now.

What I hear a lot when it comes to addressing these larger catastrophes is, "I am one person and I can't do anything to change it." This often devolves into lots of news scrolling, overwhelm, hopelessness, and rumination. On the other hand, it can lead to willfully ignoring what is happening in the world because it's so painful. 

I get it. I have been that woman. 

However, today I want to offer a shift in perspective that I hope will lead to not only peace but putting your truth into action. 

Are you ready? Here it is.

Know your scope.

Scope is defined as the opportunity or possibility to do or deal with something.

In this instance, scope is knowing your limits, understanding your capabilities, and discerning what is yours to do. 

The importance of scope was highlighted for me during the first research design project I undertook in grad school. One of the key principles of good project design is having a clearly defined scope....