Self-responsibility is powerful medicine.
At the same time, the general insistence (especially in the spiritual, healing, and personal development realm) that personal challenge = being stuck in a story is frankly, complete bullshit. It draws the attention away from what is truly being offered to you via your experience and instead, adds insult to injury via the subtle judgement that you are “stuck in a story”.
Seriously, though — isn’t it interesting that we never...
My work is so much of who I am.
So much of who YOU are, too, I know. You are dedicated, committed and absolutely on fire to do meaningful work in the world. And you do -- in big and small ways, just by being you, you are changing the ecosystem of the world through your love, through your wisdom, through your magic.
As joyful and fulfilling as work is, you need more.
You need time for deep sustenance. Time to rest. Time to think. Time for pleasure and play. Time to indulge your longings....
You do not require "fixing"
You are not a machine. You are not a toaster with a faulty heating element. There is no final, steady state of perfection, transcendence or even plain old goodness to keep reaching for. You are brilliant, wise, and you shine so bright when I see you -- I wish you believed what you really, deep down, know is true: this brilliance, your brilliance, is the real deal.
No matter how much I say this, no matter how much I repeat this, I know that it's hard to hear...
Dear beautiful you.
This is dedicated to my daughter. To your daughter. To all the daughters. To all the women who are in the lives of younger women. To all of us who are raising our voices for a deeper, wider and truer conversation that opens up a different world. I dedicate this to you.
I've been grappling. Grappling with the imperative to "be what you speak and speak what you be", as my wise friend KJ said to me. As the kid who was scorned as the town crier, I've always been a person for...
How long have you known?
You were born knowing your Truth. You knew that then, before you were told otherwise. And of course, you know that now, but at some point, you may have started walking it back, hiding it away, or even dismissing or diminishing what you know to be true for all the right reasons.
Maybe you wanted to fit in, or not get in trouble, or perhaps you noticed that the people around you didn't understand or, that there was no context in which you could understand the Truth of...
"The Ocean Refuses No River."
This beautiful chant was taught to me when I was becoming a yoga teacher at Kripalu in 2003. I have no idea what teaching our leaders were offering or the context, but I remember this morning more clearly than any other of my training. Our group sang this in rounds, with drums and it has lived in me ever since, surfacing...
You were born with an intact sense of self.
However, early on, we are indoctrinated into ideas about worthiness that lead us to believe that worth is to be found outside of ourselves -- in how we are perceived and received by those around us: another’s assessment or gaze or our monetary value or the work we do or our beauty.
This focus on recognition is the air we breathe.
Consider gender bias, not to mention racial and sexual bias — consider all the ways society...
Practice gets a bad rap.
I've heard the gamut of responses to the idea of "practice" -- from spiritual transcendence to athletic performance to dreadful, dull and boring repetitive action.
In actuality, you are practicing every moment of every day. Consciously or unconsciously, you are practicing your responses, your actions and your reactions. You are practicing your best and your worst qualities by simply doing what you do, over and over. This ultimately defines the quality of...
How do you face your demons?
This may seem like an odd question, but many women struggle to look directly at their own suffering - let alone get support or share what's happening in the realm of their darkest struggles out of fear or shame or, in the hope, perhaps, that if they ignore their demons they will disappear. Rest assured that without facing our demons directly, they will bring us to our knees, insisting on our attention in some form or fashion that we will not like.
For the sensitive, empathic woman with Work to do.
I see the ways that you've pushed yourself out into the world to the point of exhaustion, I see the way that you've been cruel to yourself in the face of your own needs, I see the way that you've tried to bend your impulses and energy to the will of the world. I see how you continue to question yourself and what you know is true.
Take a deep breath.
Do you notice how profound the stress is in your body when you send a post or share an...
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