Too many of you have been held down
In large and small ways, in direct and indirect ways, too many women are dismissed, diminished and held back from their own greatness when, in an ideal world, we would all be lifted and supported by those around us, those who came before us.
Recently, I was talking to my daughter about ancestors. I was explaining to her how we stand on the shoulders of those who go before us in the best of circumstances. We are held up, we are lifted high. Our ancestors offer us a springboard by which we fly.
To See, and live into, the Possibility Horizon
I told my daughter that my deepest desire, my most fervent prayer is that her father and I lift her high above our own shoulders so she reaches greater heights than we have. Tears stung my eyes and I realized once again, that is also my deepest desire for the women who seek inspiration through my writing and for the women who choose to work with me individually and through programs like The School of Sacred Practice: I want to lift you up so you can see to the horizon of infinite possibility in your life. I want to offer you space to heal and to know the support of someone who deeply believes in you and your capacity to realize the infinite possibilities that are calling you into the future.
To be the Woman You Are
Not many women I know were actively lifted up by their ancestors. I certainly wasn't, nor were my immediate ancestors. I would say that through sheer stubborn will and an abundance of inner fire I clawed my way past being actively held down by those around me. I am grateful for my warrior's heart. I am grateful to the people and the unseen forces and allies who believed in me and supported me.
In personal development, and Western culture in general, there is a damaging idea that we stand alone and that we, alone, control our destiny. But rest assured; circumstances, culture, violence, ancestors, genetics, the nature we have access to, our access to education -- we control very little of the outside forces that either help, or hinder, our capacity to rise, to lift others and to be lifted. Living in Zambia has amplified this truth for me -- any idea of singularly manifesting our destiny is faulty reasoning - it isolates us from seeking true support and opening to receive.
Whatever your work is, in whatever way you are called to lift others be it through raising children, working in a corporate setting, or running and building an entrepreneurial venture, it requires that you allow yourself to receive support. That you allow time for your own nourishment and healing. That you stay filled up to the brim to keep your spiritual strength.
I want you to feel the deep support of being lifted up, too, because wholeness and enlivenment begets the same. This is the foundation for the world that I want for every person, for all of us together.
There is Time.
This call to lift others can sound impossible if you are tired, if you feel unworthy, if you feel there isn't even enough for you. This can sound impossible (and actually, wildly distasteful) if you haven't been offered strong shoulders to stand on or time to tend the wounds of your own climb if your ancestors refused to let you stand on their shoulders.
It may seem there is no time to "waste" -- our bank accounts, our communities and the world need strong women who know themselves and their power to create positive change. However, that is only possible when you have given yourself the space to receive what you need. It only comes when you've given yourself time to heal fully. There is time for you: for your healing and from there, to vision and act on a new future born of your innate wholeness.
Please know that your voice, your heart, your vision -- all are necessary facets of creating an enlivened wholeness individually and collectively. Acknowledge what you've moved beyond. Acknowledge the ancestors you may still be climbing past and yes, honor the ancestors and the people who have supported and lifted you. Let yourself rest and heal. Give yourself the gift of someone, many someones, who will lift you up, who will celebrate your rise, who will help you see the horizon of possibility and help you take the steps to create that world.
May you feel the support of many hands lifting you and in turn, offer your hands to lifting others in your time.